Adulting Done Right: 90 Year Old Woman Embarks on Epic Road Trip

Have you guys read about the 90 year old woman who was diagnosed with cancer and decided to screw it all and go on a road trip? It seems that at the dawn of her 9th decade, she found out she had none other than uterine cancer. The doctor presented her with treatment options and she thought about it for a minute, then remembered she has this awesome son who lives in an RV with his wife. And then she thought about all the things she hadn't done or seen in her 90 years on this beautiful earth and when weighed against the fun of chemotherapy, a totally awesome road trip in an RV sounded so much better than enduring poisonous IVs. So off she went with her son and daughter in law on a trip that has lasted six months and has so far included a jaunt at Disney World, a Yellowstone adventure, a Grand Canyon excursion, and a hot air balloon ride. If a 90 year old woman in a hot air balloon isn't one of the most bad ass things you have ever heard, I don't know what is.

On a side note, if you used to listen to the Adam Carolla morning show you know of a game called Rich Man Poor Man. The game was centered around things that either made you really rich or really poor. For example: Outdoor furniture. If you have outdoor furniture, you might be either really rich or really poor. Another example would be having lots of cars. If you have a lot of cars, you might either be really rich with a nice, fancy car collection, or really poor with a nice selection of junk cars scattered throughout your front yard. Having a son who lives in his RV might be a fun new category in this game.

Back to Miss Norma and her fabulous road trip adventure. I just love how she threw caution to the wind and embarked on such an epic trip rather than playing it safe and doing the thing that is simply expected. I am a play it safe kind of girl. I know this might be surprising to some (especially those who knew me back in the day), but I am actually a rule following type of gal. I like to flirt with danger, to hover just on the outskirts of the contrary. I like to bat my eyelashes at the illicit but then play hard to get right before the illicit turns illegal. I might have a few too many cocktails but I put myself to bed before the real fun begins. And things have changed even more profoundly for me now that I have two young children. My life is all, "better be in bed by 9" and "no I will not be attending that fun shindig because I can't find a babysitter" and "no, I'd better not, I am trying to be a good example". But what if being a good role model is doing exactly what Miss Norma did and just YOLO'ing the hell out of this short life? Why do we wait until we are 90 and terminally ill to hop in an RV and roll down the highway free as a friggin' bird?

Oh, right. Because...bills. And responsibility. And plain old, boring adulting.

So ride on, Miss Norma. Reading about your positive attitude in spite of enduring quite a few
wicked curve balls is a lovely reminder that we do only live once, so never stop striving to live the life you love. 

Image via Scary Mommy

A Punch in the Junk

The feeling of Saturday morning freedom had descended upon our home. I was standing in the kitchen, leisurely whisking eggs as the baby chilled out in her bouncer and the toddler multi-tasked, watching the iPad and coloring. Disney tunes filled the air, when suddenly the calm was punctuated as the toddler hopped down from the table, yelling with glee as one of her jams came through the Bose. She began wiggling around and wagging her finger in a silly dance, belting out the words with such confidence in her garbled toddler talk. I laughed and sang along with her as I chopped vegetables and made funny faces at the baby.

As the song ended it flowed into the next tune. Elton John's voice rang out and I was transported back to the 90s as I hummed along cheesily to "Can You Feel the Love Tonight". My husband walked into the room at that moment and as I turned around to watch the toddler dance, my heart broke into a thousand pieces. The toddler reached her chubby little paws up to her dad and he lifted her into a giant hug, and right there in the kitchen he began to twirl around with her in his arms. I had to turn away before I was reduced into a blubbering, sappy mess over a stupid love song about two damn cartoon lions. I squeezed the baby tightly and thought about all the times I've wanted to punch my lovely husband in the face. How many toddler poop fiascoes I have been forced to endure. I even thought about that time I had to pump in a storage closet when I was on a business trip because employers just don't consider working, breastfeeding mothers. All those times I've thought that I just might lose my mind, that this family life was not what I signed up for, that maybe I am simply not cut out for this mom business flashed before me as I realized - I am exactly where I am supposed to be. Standing here in this tiny kitchen, in our too small home with our too small salaries and our too big worries. There is no where else I can imagine standing than right here, right now with my husband and our two beautiful daughters. Life in this very second is oh so sweet.

And then, just like that, the peace is shattered and reality reappears. As the song ended and my husband gently set our toddler down, she screamed mischievously and sucker punched my husband right in the junk. Laughing like a maniac, she sprinted off yelling "I got you!" as my husband sputtered in pain and I, shaking with laughter, wiped a whole different kind of tear from my eyes

Yep. We are right where we are meant to be.